


Percy Jackson Haikus

by Optronix



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Bad Haiku, Funny, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 01:27:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28520106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Optronix/pseuds/Optronix
Summary: Apollo-inspired haikus.  It's up to you to decide if I intentionally wrote them this badly and ridiculously.
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Apollo/Lucius Aelius Aurelius Commodus | Emperor Commodus (Percy Jackson), Jason Grace/Percy Jackson
Kudos: 6





	Percy Jackson Haikus

So, you’re a half-blood.  
Stay away from Annabeth  
‘Cause she is scary.

Demon birds attack.  
Everyone run for cover!  
…Who wants fried chicken?

Oooo, a manticore!  
He has three thousand attack  
Points! Was that poison?

The next person who  
Says Pan is like a dodo  
Bird will get slapped.

You’re not stealing things!  
We are in a freaking war!  
What is wrong with you?!

Hey! Where is Percy?!  
Umm, sorry… who is Percy?  
And, uhhh, who am I?

I guess there’s monsters  
Who are trying to kill me?  
Fun fact: I can’t die.

OH MY FREAKING GODS.  
You just fired on New Rome!  
Now we’re gonna die!

We are falling down.  
The last words he needs to hear  
From me: “I love you.”

Congratulations!  
Your nose bleed woke up Gaea!  
You won’t live this down.

I made several oaths  
And I’ve already broken  
All of them. Oh no.

Commodus is just  
As handsome as I recalled.  
Why’s he so awful?

It’s all fun and games  
Until someone loses the  
Son of Jupiter.

Explosion clean-up  
at the Caldecott Tunnel!  
Frank just got scorched.

I don’t think you knew  
that Hermes is a minor  
God of Poetry.

Anything would be  
Easier than trying to  
Beat big bad dad Zeus.

~~ Jercy Haikus ~~

Electrocution  
Is what Jason Grace can do.  
I love him so much.

Blond mixing with black  
Blue eyes boring into green  
They are def in love.

He’s a Sk8er Boi  
And he’s also a huge dork  
He spilled his drink.

His heart divided  
Between Roman and Greek,  
But not with Percy.

Two kisses, three, four  
A flurry of butterflies  
Happy together

Eye rolls from Jason  
As Percy dives into the  
Huge water fountain

Funny how clichés  
Become reality when  
You’re with your person.

Electrified love  
Hurricane of emotions  
“Jason can’t be dead.”

Temple Hill vacant  
Percy refuses to accept  
That his love is dead

Percy with Jason  
Is the greatest ship ever.  
FIGHT ME. I WILL WIN.


End file.
